I Don’t Understand

(Mosaic by Pam Goode)

There are so many people walking in my neighborhood. They walk for relief, to exercise their pups, to grab at the sun, for a bit of human contact, to fill and empty and refill their lungs, to live, to be life, to embrace the simple and push aside the rest.

It seems so lovely, and yet …. sometimes I wonder at this other life we live.

I wonder why we can’t halt the world at its simplest and most pure — even for a moment — and revel in it enough to get us through until the next human-made catastrophe.

I don’t understand why some have the desire to overpower. Why the rush to war … or even the acceptance of war? I don’t understand how to turn a blind eye to madness just because it’s not on my turf.

I don’t understand why or how we move from “different” to “hate.”

I don’t understand the need to control, to subjugate. I don’t understand the ego boost of physically overpowering another human being just because you can.

We’re all capable of self control, even when some part of us struggles with it.

When I was young, I believed that if I looked closely at all the horror and pain that I saw around me and really felt it, then karma would be served and I wouldn’t have to live the horror myself. I’ve been lucky there.

And yet it isn’t unusual to see horror bestowed on the gentlest and most generous.

I don’t understand.

I don’t understand.

Why can’t we all look at a human being and see a human being?