Past, Present, Future (with Sun, Sand and Bracelets)

I’ve never been called the adventurous type, and I have to admit that social gatherings scare me. I should drink more, but what can I say? I’m a lightweight. I suck at keeping up with people, and that includes the people I love most as well as those I’ve loved the longest. I’ll spare you my soul searching on that one, and only share that this past weekend, a lovely spontaneous possibility presented itself, and I didn’t say no.

Instead, I settled into a glorious reunion with my two best girls from college, neither of whom I’ve seen in something approaching thirty (!) years. The wait was way too long, but, you know . . . best laid plans . . . life intervenes.

Nature Boy ElliotI spent some time on the ride home wondering about the nature of friendship. I met Jeanne and Carol pretty much by chance and proximity. We shared a dorm, a hall, and adjacent rooms. That could have been our only bond, but it wasn’t. Out of 5,000 undergrads, they remained my closest friends throughout those years. Away from home for the first time and wading our way through growing up, it worked. But what about now? We’ve never spoken on the phone, and letters and emails have been sporadic. In fact, it took another friend to get these balls rolling again for three introverted girls.  Nature-Boy Elliot made sure we found each other again.

And here’s what I’ve learned. Life is often scarier than you anticipated, but friends still help you through. Was our friendship chance? I don’t think so. Would we still be friends if we met today? Absolutely.

What did we do? We ate, we explored, we watched the waves and got a bit sunburned, we ate more, laughed more, learned more. We posed in front of the camera for Jeanne’s SuperHost Husband Rick. What did we talk about? Exactly what we always talked about: life, family, love, ups, downs, figuring-it-all-out, and a bit of nonsense. And we did what women do best — we reaffirmed. And so I emerged on the other side of the weekend a little browner, a little more relaxed, a little happier, a little more loved, and a lot more anxious to stay in touch with those who have helped make me who I am. I miss our abundance of innocence and idealism sometimes, but we still pretty damn well rock it.


8 thoughts on “Past, Present, Future (with Sun, Sand and Bracelets)

  1. Pam, world traveller, business owner, sharing one’s personal thoughts — in my book, I’d call that adventurous. As for the spontaneous beach trip, sounds like you all found it healthy and rejuvenating. For what little role I may have played, I am glad to have been the instigator. Friendship is something sacred in our hearts and souls, and time, while effective at eroding most of our creations, cannot defeat the joy of a true friend. You have been, and shall always be, one of mine. Thanks, Elliot


  2. Awe…that is so touching. It is reassuring to know that it is possible to reconnect, even after so many years. I should forward this post to a few (neglected, but missed) friends. As usual, thanks for your beautiful perspective, Pamela.


  3. What a great post! I plan to do as many spontaneous things as possible. 😀 A friend I haven’t seen in 15 years and who lives four hours away will be at the beach 2.5 hours away this coming weekend, so I’m going to see her. We haven’t even spoken in that many years; we just lost touch. I kept looking for her on Facebook, and one day, she appeared. Can’t wait to do what you did.


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